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Today's Poll: Should cyberbullying be a crime?

By Howard B. Owens
C. M. Barons

Facetious comment removed due to being taken seriously.

There is no defense for bullying or bullies. Those who assert that bullies or their behavior is a right of passage or boys-being-boys are out of touch. Kids are dying because of it, and it's no longer just boy-behavior.

There are two reasons that bullying has moved to cyberspace. One, it's less obvious to parents and school officials, those most likely to suppress bullying. Two, cyberspace is where the current crop of teenagers interact.

I have mixed feelings on what should be done about cyberbullying. It would seem that anything aside from violent threats and libel would be protected speech. It would also seem reasonable, insults played out in cyberspace are less likely to result in physical altercation. Frankly, insulting someone on FB instead of face-to-face sounds pretty cowardly to me. I don't think schools have any business scrutinizing student FB pages anymore than I think they should scrutinize student diaries. ...That's not to say parents shouldn't be minding what their kids are doing. As to whether law enforcement should be monitoring social websites, probable cause should be the rule. I DO believe social websites should be legally responsible for dangerous content posted on their site. That -in itself- would be a prime motivator to limit injurious behavior. Along with the "Like" button, a "Report Abuse" button.

Apr 20, 2012, 11:14am Permalink
Kyle Couchman

And how does that end cyberbullying CM they have these things called laptops, and computers. You can go to most public libraries and commit this act without a cell phone on the taxpayers dime as well.

Having had some distant family ties to the suicide in Spencerport, I got involved early in what was happening there. The comments and abuse that was occuring there was ridiculous, not only that but the bullies continued after her death as well to torture her surviving friends and supporters. Once public outcry started to focus on the posts these kids began pulling and erasing these posts making the investigation even more complex.

I'm sorry but even the best parents nowadays cant know everything that is going on. I am 40ish and wether they want to or not, all us adults know that when we were kids, bullies abounded and knew the system, they got away with things looked like angels to the other adults, and some of us bullied people knew how stupid we be made to look at complaint about bullying, and when we fought back how much trouble we'd get in cause we looked like the agressor. Those truths we know. Nowadays kids have the added complexities of facebook twitter and cell phones to contend with and like it or not it's gonna happen.

As for the argument of parents should know and be dealing with this? Go back to our childhoods 20 30 or 40 yrs ago. How many things did YOU do that your parents never found out about or had no clue about, most of us had good parents or at least attentive parents, but kids will find a way to have some secrets, and something like this is a common one.
So my vote is yes......the stricter the better.

Apr 20, 2012, 8:27am Permalink
Doug Yeomans

It's impossible to be cyber bullied. If someone does manage to interact with you online or through your phone, there's already a law for that. It's called harassment. We need more new laws like we need more new taxes. There's a magic button on every computer called an "on/off" switch.

Apr 20, 2012, 8:48am Permalink
Kyle Couchman

not really Doug....thats an oversimplification. cyberbullying isnt just about personal attacks, its about doing it while playing to a group. kid turn it off then 2o of their friends and aquaintences ambush them with it the next day.

Would you expect a politician to leave an accusation unanswered and ignored like this if posted on the internet?

Apr 20, 2012, 9:21am Permalink
Doug Yeomans

Sounds like a behavior problem if friends ambush other friends. I still think that allowing kids to all have a smart phone and a computer is way too much responsibility for them. It's way too much responsibility for a lot of adults. That's the real problem.

It's obvious to me what the problem is and it really is simple. I know people will disagree with me, but that's okay.

Apr 20, 2012, 9:42am Permalink
Kyle Couchman

I can agree with that part Doug but we cant make other parents choices.

But on the behavior note...kleptomania and serial murder are behavior problems as well but we arent going to ignore those.

Apr 20, 2012, 9:57am Permalink
Doug Yeomans

Amen Kyle. Doesn't it seem as though that morality is trying to be legislated by law?

Examples:

People shouldn't bully other people regardless of age but since teachers and parents can't backhand a kid or other adults into compliance anymore, we'll just make new laws and admonish people behind the closed doors of a court room - Mission FAIL. (Some site member will run with this one. "So Doug, violence is the answer?")

Doing drugs "can" be bad but since people are too stupid (sarcasm) to know what's good or bad for them, we're going to just make every drug illegal and throw you into jail if you're caught with them - Mission FAIL.

You like to smoke cigarettes but heaven forbid if you come off the rez with too many. We'll charge you with tax evasion! We don't care that you live in Rochester and only want to make the drive every couple of months. We're going to FORCE you to make that drive every week and use up all that gasoline, you tax evading putz!- (As a kid, I loved the smell of Borkum Riff cherry pipe tobacco and as an adult I enjoyed Backwoods cigars.)

The next thing you know, the church you attend or DON'T attend will be chosen for you because the people in charge know what's best for you...and don't you forget it!

I could go on and on but I'm sure you get the point...

Apr 20, 2012, 10:32am Permalink
Kyle Couchman

Again no argument here Doug, but as you pointed out as well....police take advantage of ignorance as well. Most arrests for violating the minimum cartons allowed is due to ignorance, they are pulled over for something else......not keeping right, not obeying speed limits, throwing garbage out of window etc. Most dont know they dont have to submit to requested searches. 2nd point on the cigarette thing when i run....i have a signed note along w cash from the people i'm buying for, separate reciepts, separate change along w notes stating who is getting what. Pull me over.....try to charge me, i have documentation. If they do then next time i'll include ss numbers on notes. Drugs, well that can be argued either way and still be valid. As for the spanking, i still spanked my kids regardless, i did deal w cps once when they were young due to a busybody, but cps didnt find anything wrong w a little discipline, but again asses that take it to an extreme are the reason the system tries to overregulate.

in time it'll be like jaywalking....it illegal and ticketable but how often do you see it happen.....only in extreme cases.

Your point is valid but laws only work if they are there..... Can't prosecute a future psychopath that is bullying today without the laws to do so.... Having one child kill themselves due to bullying is in my opinion one too many, but if the bully is jailed and fined maybe having a consequence may curb the tendency to do it later in life.

Apr 20, 2012, 11:10am Permalink
Peter O'Brien

Great another buzz word becomes a law.

This society is killing it self.

We don't need a law for kids using a new medium to do the same stuff.

The only way bullying stops is to have some self respect and some gonads and fight back. Don't give me this crap about bullying on Facebook, just unfriend the idiot. Texting an issue? Block the number. Tweets filling your inbox, you can fix that too. Cyber bullying is a buzzword for doing what humans do over a new medium Its teling others you are better than them to move yourself up in the ranks over a computer. Its Sports trash talking over the internet. Thats all.

Put on some leather armor if your skin is too thin and remember that you actively choose to be offended by someone else's words.

Apr 20, 2012, 12:44pm Permalink
C. M. Barons

Odd thing about arguments on this site, if the state outlaws flavored tobacco, it's behaving as a "nanny state." If the county initiates enhanced drunk-driving checkpoints it's violating motorists' freedom. If the courts grant bail to defendants charged with certain crimes, they're putting society at risk. If the government institutes mandatory health insurance it's slipping into socialism. If the EPA bans smog-producing wood stoves, it's infringing on home-owners rights. If the police arrest illegal gambling promoters, they're exceeding their charge. Pot smokers should be ignored while meth labs should be prosecuted to the hilt. A shopper who punches an elderly store employee should be locked up; a teenager who's boyfriend dies in an alcohol-related golf cart accident warrants leniency. If kids won't behave civilly, then law enforcement or the schools need to step in. I can't keep up with all the inconsistency and exceptions to rule.

Apr 20, 2012, 1:42pm Permalink
Mark Brudz

LOL CM, in the words of Master Po to Grasshopper:

Master Po: Close your eyes. What do you hear?
Young Caine: I hear the water, I hear the birds.
Po: Do you hear your own heartbeat?
Caine: No.
Po: Do you hear the grasshopper which is at your feet?
Caine: Old man, how is it that you hear these things?
Po: Young man, how is it that you do not?

Apr 20, 2012, 1:52pm Permalink
Kyle Couchman

Peter people like you have been saying to the bullied get some self respect, and the balls to fight back and everything will stop, since the 1920's seems to work real well. My observation in life is that theres a vocal minority such as yourself that always defends this behavior as human nature and that you just ignore or stand up to it. Those that I have heard it from 9 times out of 10 are either bullies themselves or the parents of bullies making excuses for their lil darlings. The fact is kids are being persecuted, and when they try to get help they get told to just ignore or fight back or tell other adults, all or which make the situation worse by empowering the bully and making the victim feel more helpless.

So you can go on with your opinion and suggestions, the next time a kid either kills himself or goes to school and slaughters a dozen kids you can be the one to be proud that he grew a pair and stood up. Or tell his grieveing parents that he should have had a thicker skin and chose not to be offended by the words and deeds of his persecutors.

Apr 20, 2012, 2:34pm Permalink
Peter O'Brien

Kyle,
Standing up to the bully worked well in the 1940s....late 1770's.... and with the exception of demoralizing Germany with the treaty of Versailles, well in the 1920's as well....seemed to work well with a dictator in the 1990's and again in 2003...

And it worked well for me when I was in school. I was the bullied. I was the picked on. I had no self esteem. I had few friends. I was/am a geek. I got thrown out a window at school. I got repeated pushed and shoved during recess. I got forced into a fight with the tallest guy in 1st grade.... I had a teacher who made me feel like crap in front of the other students (only now do I realize he was giving me the same advice that worked for me) I had a metal stool thrown at me while sitting at my desk. I had icy-hot rubbed on my bare chest while 6 guys held me down in the locker room. I was a late bloomer and had my lack of pubic and leg hair criticized. I was laughed at for my interest in reading Science Fiction. I had girls try to use me to do their work by acting sexual towards me with no real thought of touching me. I came home day after day and cried that my life sucks to my mother. I had to go to counseling as a child because of my lack of self esteem. I experienced bullying. I know what I am talking about.

Now I have self esteem, a large group of good friends, self respect, a beautiful wife, a promising career, and best of all, the satisfaction of seeing my bullies suck at life. As a matter of fact, I love going where they work and getting them to do things like bag my groceries.

I offer my words of advice from experience. And while I am not a millionaire, I live a very happy life because I chose to not be offended by their words. I decided to fight back instead of take the beatings. I decided to learn how to return the worst of the verbal name calling. I chose to beat them at their own game. And I chose to like my self regardless of what others said.

Apr 20, 2012, 4:12pm Permalink
Kyle Couchman

Very nice that it worked for you......but you arent everyone, even from your own description it was a long hard battle. one you shouldn't have had to wage. It doesnt work for everyone, but laws making bullies more accountable would make things easier to deal with. Not everyone has your fortitude.

Apr 20, 2012, 7:25pm Permalink
Frank Bartholomew

CM, I agree we sometimes don't know the answers, cyber bullying is a new problem, straight up bullying is an old problem. My take is , we don't know the extent of damage it does to a young person, until it happens to someone we know or love.
Based upon certain knowledge, I wouldn't let anyone from the City School District babysit my dog while I ran out to get a newspaper, let alone charge them to fight this problem.

Apr 21, 2012, 4:23am Permalink
C. M. Barons

Frank, I think we all know the answer to this problem. Enacting a law makes the solution someone-else's affair. Criminalizing bullying will create two new sets of problems: it will delay intervention until the problem reaches a critical stage, and it will up the ante on whatever perceived inequity initiated the bullying behavior. The solution to bullying lies squarely in the court of parents. Parents need to teach their children how to compete with their peers. (compete- not defeat, see "Karate Kid") Parents also need to establish personal responsibility within their children. I recognize these are not easy tasks. I recognize that with working parents, time is limited to impart these lessons. Two thoughts: rather than creating a new youth criminal class, why not mandate a statewide parenting class for high school students? As parents, when we give a child a gift such as a computer, automobile, cell phone, etc., detail expectations on how it will be used and not used. The privilege of having a cell phone, computer or car should be conditional on how it is put to use. Too often the distinction between needs, rights and privileges become blurred when gifts are given without strings attached.

Apr 21, 2012, 11:57am Permalink
Frank Bartholomew

CM, I don't believe there is a one size fits all solution, I've seen good kids who come from bad homes, and bad kids who come from good homes. I'm certainly not disagreeing with your assessment, I'm just saying it's not always the case. We live in a "in your face" world, as emulated by proffessional sports players, most who are college educated, a guy makes millions of dollars because he is a gifted athlete, yet when he is successful in his job performance, he celebrates like a man who just hit the lottery. Trash talking, strutting around, dancing, thats not the way a proffesional should act, yet we accept, and idolize these players.
A parent can do many things to make sure the child understands responsibility, but in the real world,the mentallity seems to be: once you got someone down, keep kicking them to remove all doubt as to whether they will get up or live to fight another day.
In this me,me,me,world, unfortunately, it is compete to defeat, if your not first, your last.
It,s all about being the best, and not about being the best you can be.

Apr 21, 2012, 2:31pm Permalink
Bea McManis

Interesting contrast:
"and best of all, the satisfaction of seeing my bullies suck at life. As a matter of fact, I love going where they work and getting them to do things like bag my groceries"
vs
"In this me,me,me,world, unfortunately, it is compete to defeat, if your not first, your last.
It,s all about being the best, and not about being the best you can be."

Apr 21, 2012, 3:27pm Permalink
Jeff Allen

The greatest satisfaction comes when a bully humbles themselves before a risen Savior and learns that serving others brings far more satisfaction and reward to life than hurting people.

Apr 21, 2012, 3:42pm Permalink

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